My Movie Collection

I wanted to see how many of MY movies you've all seen. Enjoy.

( )28 Days Later
( )28 Weeks Later
( )30 Days of Night
( )300
( )The 40 Year Old Virgin
( )The Abandoned
( )Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
( )Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls
( )Alien
( )Aliens

Total:

( )Alien 3
( )Alien: Resurrection
( )American Gangster
( )American Psycho
( )An American Werewolf in London
( )The Amityville Horror (2005)
( )Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgandy
( )Appleseed
( )Appleseed Ex Machina
( )Azumi

Total:

( )Batman Begins
( )The Dark Knight
( )Battle Royale
( )A Beautiful Mind
( )The Beach
( )Beowulf
( )The Beyond
( )Big Fish
( )Big Trouble in Little China
( )Black Hawk Down

Total:

( )Blade
( )Blade 2
( )Blade: Trinity
( )Blade Runner
( )Blood Diamond
( )Body of Lies
( )The Boondock Saints
( )The Bourne Identity
( )The Bourne Supremacy
( )The Bourne Ultimatum

Total:

( )Braveheart
( )Brotherhood of the Wolf
( )Cabin Fever
( )Casino Royale
( )Child's Play
( )Children of Men
( )Clash of the Titans
( )Cloverfield
( )Club Dread
( )Collateral

Total:

( )Coraline
( )Crash
( )Creep
( )The Crow
( )The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
( )Dagon
( )Dance of the Dead
( )Dark Floors
( )The DaVinci Code
( )Dead Alive

Total:

( )Dead or Alive (DOA)
( )The Departed
( )The Descent
( )The Devil's Advocate
( )Die Hard
( )Live Free or Die Hard
( )Disturbia
( )Dog Soldiers
( )Donnie Darko
( )Doom

Total:

( )Doomsday
( )Dracula
( )Eastern Promises
( )End of Days
( )Enemy at the Gates
( )Equilibrium
( )Event Horizon
( )The Evil Dead
( )Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn
( )Army of Darkness

Total:

( )The Exorcist
( )The Eye (original)
( )The Faculty
( )The Fast and the Furious
( )Fight Club
( )Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children Complete
( )Friday the 13th
( )Friday the 13th (2009)
( )Friday the 13th Part 2
( )Friday the 13th Part 3

Total:

( )Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
( )Friday the 13th 5: A New Beginning
( )Friday the 13th 6: Jason Lives
( )Friday the 13th 7: The New Blood
( )Friday the 13th 8: Jason Takes Manhattan
( )Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday
( )Jason X
( )Freddy vs. Jason
( )His Name Was Jason
( )Fright Night

Total:

( )The Frighteners
( )From Beyond
( )From Hell
( )Frontier(s)
( )The Game
( )Ghost in the Shell
( )Ghostbusters
( )Gladiator
( )The Goonies
( )Grandma's Boy

Total:

( )The Green Mile
( )Hackers
( )Halloween
( )Halloween (2007)
( )Halloween 2
( )Halloween 3: Season of the Witch
( )Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers
( )Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers
( )Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers
( )Halloween H2O

Total:

( )Halloween Resurrection
( )Hard Candy
( )The Haunting (1999)
( )Heat
( )Hellboy
( )Hellboy 2: The Golden Army
( )Hellboy: Sword of Storms
( )Hellboy: Blood & Iron
( )Hellraiser
( )The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

Total:

( )A History of Violence
( )The Hitcher (2007)
( )The Host
( )House of 1000 Corpses
( )The Devil's Rejects
( )House on Haunted Hill (1999)
( )Hot Fuzz
( )I, Robot
( )I am Legend
( )The Incredible Hulk

Total:

( )Raiders of the Lost Ark
( )Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
( )Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
( )Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
( )Inside
( )Inside Man
( )In the Mouth of Madness
( )Iron Man
( )The Island
( )Jacob's Ladder

Total:

( )The Jacket
( )Jaws
( )Ju-on
( )The Grudge
( )Ju-on 2
( )Jurassic Park
( )The Lost World: Jurassic Park
( )Jurassic Park 3
( )King Arthur
( )King Kong

Total:

( )The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters
( )Kingdom of Heaven
( )Kung Fu Panda
( )The Last Samurai
( )Legend
( )Let the Right One In
( )The Hobbit
( )The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
( )The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring Extended Cut
( )The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Total:

( )The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers Extended Cut
( )The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
( )The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King Extended Cut
( )Lord of War
( )The Lost Boys
( )The Matrix
( )Animatrix
( )Martyrs
( )Memento
( )Midnight Meat Train

Total:

( )Mimic
( )Mind Hunters
( )The Mist
( )Mortal Kombat
( )My Bloody Valentine
( )My Bloody Valentine (2009)
( )National Treasure
( )Night of the Living Dead
( )Night of the Living Dead (1990)
( )Dawn of the Dead

Total:

( )Dawn of the Dead (2004)
( )Day of the Dead (1985)
( )Land of the Dead
( )Diary of the Dead
( )Nightmare Detective
( )A Nightmare on Elm Street
( )No Country for Old Men
( )Office Space
( )Oldboy
( )One Missed Call (original)

Total:

( )The Orphanage
( )Out Cold
( )Panic Room
( )Pan's Labyrinth
( )Pet Semetary
( )Phantoms
( )Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
( )Pitch Black
( )Planet Terror
( )Predator

Total:

( )The Prestige
( )Prince of Darkness
( )Princess Mononoke
( )Pulse (Kairo)
( )Pulse
( )Pumpkinhead
( )Rambo
( )[REC]
( )Reincarnation (Rinne)
( )The Relic

Total:

( )Resident Evil
( )Resident Evil: Apocalypse
( )Resident Evil: Extinction
( )Resident Evil: Degeneration
( )Return of the Living Dead
( )Ringu
( )The Ring
( )Saving Private Ryan
( )Scream
( )Serenity

Total:

( )The Serpent and the Rainbow
( )Se7en
( )Shaun of the Dead
( )The Shawshank Redemption
( )The Shining (original)
( )Shutter (original)
( )Silent Hill
( )Sin City
( )6 Films to Keep You Awake
( )Sleepy Hollow

Total:

( )Snatch
( )Sphere
( )Spirited Away
( )Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
( )Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
( )Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
( )Stay
( )Stir of Echoes
( )The Strangers
( )Sunshine

Total:

( )Superbad
( )Super Troopers
( )Suspiria
( )Taken
( )A Tale of Two Sisters
( )Tears of the Sun
( )The Terminator
( )Terminator 2: Judgment Day
( )The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
( )Them

Total:

( )The Thing
( )TMNT (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)
( )Tommy Boy
( )Transformers
( )Tropic Thunder
( )Troy
( )Underworld
( )Underworld Evolution
( )Unleashed
( )V for Vendetta

Total:

( )Vampire Hunter D
( )Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust
( )Van Wilder
( )Videodrome
( )Wanted
( )Watchmen
( )Watchmen The Complete Motion Comics
( )X-Men 1.5
( )X2
( )Zodiac

Total:
Grand Total: /280

( ) Zombie Strippers [Bonus Film!]

Super Mega Ultra Grand Total: /281

Note: I tried to count 'em off 10 to a section but this was done at 3 in the morning and, holy hell, my eyes are hurtin'. Hopefully I counted right.

Blockbuster Season

It appears I'm talking to myself on this blog. But, just in case anyone happens to stop by, I'm gonna keep on posting. Also, it's good for me to lighten my mental load a bit.

In case you haven't figured it out from my last couple of posts, the summer blockbuster season officially started last week with X-Men Origins: Wolverine. This is my favorite time of year; I love movies and I especially love movies that are hyped to all hell. So that's my new shtick. When the newest summer blockbuster is released, I'll more-likely-than-not be there. And once I get back from there, I'll be posting my thoughts on said movie. So, my non-existent audience, stay tuned for my reviews.

x X-Men Origins: Wolverine
x Star Trek
x Angeles and Demons
x Terminator Salvation
Drag Me to Hell
Up
Land of the Lost
Year One
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Public Enemies
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Final Destination: Death Trip
Inglorious Basterds
H2

To Boldly Go...

...to the movies.

It's just a bit before midnight on Thursday and Tara and I just got home from Star Trek . Now, I was always a Star Wars, rarely--very rarely--a Star Trek fan. I've seen maybe 5 episodes of the original series, and somewhere around a season's worth of The Next Generation. To me, Star Trek was more akin to a space-based soap opera whereas Star Wars was action and cool special effects. Still, seeing the trailers for J.J. Abrams reboot of the Star Trek series got me a little jazzed.

So, how did it turn out? I know reviews have been littering the intrawebs for a couple of weeks already, but regardless, I'm gonna write me own and I'm definitely gonna repeat some of the same opinions. Star Trek makes me, a Star Wars child, want to go back and give the original "space soap opera" a try. This reboot had enough sci-fi action, sans the over-abundance of crappily used CGI, to give Star Wars a run for it's money. Well, no, I take that back; it pretty much decimates Episodes I-III, but still falls a little short of what the original Star Wars accomplished (c'mon, I'm not gonna turn my back on a childhood love that fast).

The Enterprise's crew were all likeable, IMO, the acting, spot-on. I've heard that Chekov (Anton Yelchin) rubbed people the wrong way a bit, which I can see, but he didn't bother me. Chris Pine, who I'd never even heard of before this reboot hit my radar, did a bang-up job as Kirk; he had all the charisma, cockiness, and command needed to pull of his role. Zachary Quinto was pretty much the only possible replacement for Leonard Nimoy's Spock, but that's fine seeing as he absolutely nailed it. Karl Urban, who'll I've always had a fondness for (along with anyone else who was in the Lord of the Rings), was pretty damn amazing as "Bones" McCoy. John Cho, known for his comedic roles, really pulled his weight as a serious character in Sulu's shoes. Zoe Saldana's portrayal of Uhura was one that made her instantly likable (and she wasn't bad on the eyes, either). And finally, my favorite actor--who I wish had more screen-time--was Scotty, played by the always-amazing Simon Pegg; instantly and unerringly likable.

Nero (Eric Bana), really the only baddy worth mentioning, was amazing. To have a villian who was a regular joe was refreshing. Instead of having some criminal mastermind, we have an everyman Romulan who watched his entire civilization destroyed, blames Spock and the Federation for not helping, and simply wants revenge. He's a "man" who just lost his way due to immense tragedy, and he's going about righting the wrongs the only way he knows how. Doesn't make him right or likable, but a part of you can almost understand why he's doing what he's doing.

Moving past the cast and on to the production value, Star Trek has way, way, WAY better effects than last week's Wolverine. The CGI used was restrained. Obviously a lot of CGI was necessary for this film, but it was employed ONLY when necessary. It was flashy, sure, but it wasn't at the expense of the story and the characters. First and foremost, it was apparent that J.J. made this film with the original series and the fans of that series in mind.

So yes, it does do the original series justice, just as it does that series' characters justice, but it doesn't create a dividing wall that leaves the fans satisfied and the newly-initiated scratching their heads. This film is complete in its presentation. Even someone who has never seen a single episode of Star Trek can sit down in a dark theater and understand what is being shown to them.

To me, even though it's only the second released, Star Trek is the fist summer blockbuster to truly be worthy of being called a summer blockbuster. It's fun, emotional, beautiful, and all-around engaging. If it came down to it, I'd recommend Star Trek above Wolverine, hands-down. See it in theaters. Hell, if it's available, see it in IMAX.

8.5/10

I'll be back next week with a review for Angels and Demons. The week after that, the McG (really, what kind of name is that?) sequel, Terminator Salvation, hits theaters and there'll also be a review there.

I'm Back! (again)

After getting paid yesterday, my first order of business was to go pick up a new LIVE subscription. Success! 13 months of LIVE for me. ::happy dance::

Also, for anyone who listens to the OXM podcast, I got a little recognition on yesterday's episode (number 159). I won the Name That Xbox Sound Effect contest, so Ryan and Dan obviously mentioned me. What I found funny was the amount of detail they went into in regards to Bemidji; they actually took the time to do a bit of research. Everyone still assumes Minnesotans are backwoods hicks who sound like they do in Fargo, but oh well, what can ya do. Anyways, it was nothing too spectacular, but being up in the boondocks (hence the in-good-fun jabs from OXM), it's nice to know that the outside world exists and, in turn, knows we exist as well.

Check out OXM.

KNOWING that SPOILERS may follow is in your best interest

So I went to Knowing tonight. Sure, I'm a couple of weeks late, but oh well. I was thinking the movie looked good from the trailers, and I've liked Alex Proyas' other films (The Crow, Dark City, I, Robot), so I finally drug myself into the theater. I've gotta say, I'm glad I did.

The film has an interesting enough premise: a girl in 1959 writes a shit-ton of numbers on a sheet of paper and adds it to her class' time capsul. 50 years later, the time capsul is dug up and the paper uncovered. Nic Cage, being the super genius we all know he is, discovers that the numbers relate to every major disaster that has happened over the past 50 years (with 3 yet to occur). From there it's a little mystery, some cool effects, some distubring situations, and holy fuckness.

The acting isn't too shabby. A little bit of over-the-topness from Nicky, but what do you expect? The guy has had something of a losing streak lately, and it's nice to see him in a movie I'll actually admit to watching. Rose Byrne is in the film and she's a little--excessive at times, but for the most part acceptable. But let's face it, I didn't go to this movie for Oscar-worthy acting, and I don't think anyone else did either.

So what DID we go for? Glad you asked. The shit hitting the fan, to put it bluntly. This is a sci-fi film, but it's also a disaster movie. As such, there has to be some cool scenarios. Rest assured, there are. The effects kind of flip-flopped between being excellent to being "just decent", but the content of the scene as a whole really kept me from being overly critical of the CG and whatnot. There's a plane crash that looks badass (and, to be honest, I was a little shocked by the brutality of it), a subway crash that has it's ups and downs, and, well, I won't spoil the final hoorah...yet.

Note: Major SPOILERS follow.

Now I want to get into the part of this movie that really made me appreciate it. I think this movie did an excellent job of appealing to both sides of a never-ending debate: science or mircales, evolution or creation, chance or divine power.

Although on the surface they say that the events in this film are the result of chance or science (mechanical malfunctions, weather, and solar flares, to be precise), one could also watch Knowing and see all kinds of religious symbolism. Towards the end, the aliens (yes, there are aliens involved) take on an angelic appearance once they revert to their true form (a type of wing can be seen), and it can also be interpretted that the aliens act as the voice of God (a higher power is speaking to the chosen). On top of that, they create a type of "Noah's Ark" to save the human race from total destruction (Armageddon).

And then, of course, if there is a God and if He created the entire universe, it would stand to reason He created the aliens. So, thinking back to Dogma, we remember that hearing God would kill us puny mortals, and therefore an intermediary would be needed to speak on God's behalf. Thus, the aliens bring a message from God to save humanity just before the End. Like I said, religious symbolism.

The film has its flaws, but it was entertaining, and it walks a line similar to the one The Exorcism of Emily Rose did--it gives the audience, who is divided by their beliefs of spirituality and science (or however you want to say it), a scenario, and then allows them to draw their own conclusions, find out what it means to them. Some see a freak natural occurance and aliens, others see God's wrath and the angels He has sent to save the chosen few. Two sides of the same coin? You decide.

I may be agnostic, but I can definitely appreciate a film that is put together in such a way as to not choose one side over another, but instead to work towards uniting--or at least accepting--both sides. Just because I'm not religious doesn't mean I abhor all things religious.

Anywho, Knowing is well crafted and entertaining. Definitely worth a watch.

10 years later and there's still a splinter in my mind

Way back in 1999, two relatively unknown brothers-turned-directors brought us one of the most groundbreaking, imaginative sci-fi/action movies of all time. I know people say that about shit all the time, but IMO, this time it's for realz.

The Matrix was a pioneer in special effects, throwing enough bullets and fire at the camera to take on Ted Nugent while, at the same time, introducing the mainstream movie-viewing audiences to bullet time (whether or not they actually invented bullet time is still debated). and beyond that, under all of that spit and polish, there was something more. For one of the first times, I saw a film that not only kept me entertained on a glorious, action-packed level, but also on a deep, intellectual level as well. To this day, I can still throw in the Wachowski Brothers' masterpiece (and I do believe it to be a masterpiece) and be completely enthralled in the world(s) they have created. The effects still, for the most part, hold up, and the story is still as engaging and thought-provoking as ever.

Keanu is still clueless--but in this role it works--and Laurence "I am Morpheus" Fishburn is kicking ass in all his bald glory; Carrie-Anne Moss, who, until this movie, was unknown to me, pulls her weight as the ass-kicking dominatrix love interest; and finally, this is where Joey Pants and Hugo "Agent Elrond" Weaving were first brought to my attention. What I'm trying to say is that this cast is solid without being an ensamble of grade-A pretty boys and girls.

The plot, for those not in the know, is about a computer generated dream world that is actually the world we live in every day. Keanu is Neo who wants to know what the Matrix is. Morpheus is the guy who can enlighten him. I'd tell you more but, as Morpheus says, "No one can tell you what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself." Regardless, its name kicking and ass taking to the max times infinity. Alright, I may be exaggerating a bit. Seriously though, there's enough action and explosions to make any Die Hard fan happy; enough effects to amaze you and make you hate George Lucas for making us overdose on Jar-Jar; and enough philosophical depth holding it all together to make you wonder why geeks and nerds aren't getting laid more.

Am I gushing? Maybe, but so what. I'm a fanboy. There, I said it. But it's not without reason. The Matrix is a damn fine film. One of my top 5, actually. It may not be that way for everyone, but I still suggest you give it a chance.

And what better way than the newly released 10th Anniversary Blu-ray edition of The Matrix. Go. Now.

Rated R? No problem. Rated Mature? No chance.

March 27, 2009

Why oh why do video games continually get the shaft? A debate as old as time (or at least as old as video games with more depth than a wheel of cheese eating dots), why are video games held to different standards than, say, movies? If a movie is rated R, it has a list of details explaining that rating. If a game is rated Mature, it also has a list explaining that rating. Yet a Mature rated game is judged more harshly than an R rated film.

Why? Because games are, quote unquote, "for children"? Look at today's gaming community and you'll see the demographic is across the board. But, apparently, that's besides the point. It's a game and it's interactive and, whether it's meant for adults or not, children can still get a hold of them and play them.

Yeah, 'cause kids have such a hard time seeing R rated films without an adult.

I'll admit that there are a lot of games that are rated "Mature" but are quite the opposite, but that's not what the rating is saying. It's telling the consumer, whether the person making the purchase is a kid, an adult, or a parent, that the game is for a mature audience. That means that it is recommended for people who can handle the type of situations placed in the game. Much the same way as an R rated film is telling the audience that there are mature situations in the film and only mature people should view it. So seriously, what's the deal?

Grand Theft Auto lets you murder and steal and blah blah blah. It's rated Mature, the consumer is made aware of the graphic nature of the content, and yet it still gets ripped apart by the media. Mass Effect has a sex scene, a tastefully done sex scene between two consenting adults, and it's the talk of the nation. Why? How many movies have murder in them? You can see a PG-13 movie and have people getting murdered (granted, the result is pretty shitty when it comes to entertainment standards, but I digress)! Jeez, freakin' Titanic had Kate Winslet's chesticles out there for a PG-13 audience to ogle.

So I ask again: If a video game is given a Mature rating, why should it be judged any differently than an R rated movie? The ESRB applies the rating and what in the game is responsible for that rating. We, as consumers, should be aware of this. If you're not, well, it's you're own fault. Read the labels. They're there for a reason.

Breaking it down

A follow-up to the last post.

March 26, 2009

Breaking it down as simply as possible:

Resident Evil 1, 2, 3, CV = Alien = horror
Resident Evil 4, 5 = Aliens = action

I'm a big fan of both movies, but I think Alien is superior. I'm always a horror guy, and Ridley Scott made an excellent horror movie with Alien. That film was a prime example of survival horror in movie terms.

On the other hand, Jim Cameron took Ridley's film and the ideas he put forth and took it to a new level. There are still horror elements in Aliens, but now, instead of being weaponless against one tough baddy, the heroes are armed to the teeth but the enemy has upped the ante.

Even in structure, the two are similar. In the original REs, you're exploring a confined area, similar to the Nostromo. In RE 4 or 5 you're movie from area to area within a region, similar to the marines moving around the colony on LV-426.

Who watches the WATCHMEN? I do!

March 6, 2009

After nearly a quarter of the century, the book that was quoted as being "un-filmable" is finally hitting the big screen. So, did Zack Snyder (300) do the source material justice, or is this just one more butchered adaptation?

Normally, I throw in a little spice, a little background, with my reviews. This time, I'm skipping that part. If you want to know how much trouble this film went through in the process of getting made, or if you don't know and want to find out what the Watchmen is about, look it up on your own time. Otherwise, I'm going to assume those of you who are reading this want to know how the movie stacks up according to my own opinion.

First off: As a fan of the graphic novel, I thought the film was great. Is it perfect? No. Does it have its share of problems? Absolutely. Does that mean you should skip it? Absolutely NOT.

Watchmen is very dense. There are a number of characters, all with their own history, to keep track of; there are stories WITHIN the story. Basically, you've got an onion in your hands; layers upon layers upon layers. The depth is astounding. To try and put that into a 2 hour movie would be impossible. It was hard enough with a 2 hour and 45 minute time-frame. For me, this movie did what Lord of the Rings did nearly a decade ago, it condensed the heart of the source material into something digestible for the common audience. This is the fast food version of the graphic novel; you get the gist in short order, but it comes at the price of missing elements. Things were left out along the way, but by and large, they were secondary to the heart of the story.

That story is still there, but I still have to question: will a non-reader of the Watchmen novel understand what's happening? I went with Tara, but since it was a midnight showing and she's already in bed, I wasn't able to ask what she got out of the film. Even as someone who has read the book, I feel like maybe the film feels a little too disjointed to be absorbed as easily as needed. Don't get me wrong, it happens in much the same way the graphic novel, but it happens much quicker. The audience has all of these characters and their relationships and their history thrown at them. On top of that, they have all of this information about conspiracies and nuclear war with Russia to wrap their minds around. Like I said: an onion.

The acting was, for the most part, pretty good. Others have said it (and there's a possibility that their opinions may have influenced my own, so take it with a grain of salt), but Malin Akerman (Silk Spectre) was a little wooden. Not horribly so, just not quite up to snuff.

On the other hand, Jackie Earle Haley was da bomb (oh yes, I went there) as Rorschach. Again, others have said it, but this opinion is my own. There is no other Rorschach. Tara said his voice bothered her because he sounded just like Christian Bale's portrayal of Batman. This is true, but it's just the way it had to be. Seriously. Pick up the graphic novel and look at his jabber bubble. I'll wait. Got a copy? Ok. Now find Rorschach in there. Good? Good. See, the bubble has jagged edges. When I saw that, I read it as a gravelly voice. Apparently I wasn't the only one. It fits. Moving on. No, not from Rorschach, from his VOICE. I'm just getting started on Rorschach. JEH played the character with just the right nuances. He was crazy in the right ways. He was, for a man of his stature, one hell of a bad ass. "You don't understand. I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with ME!" He was the character I cheered for because he was the one kicking so much ass. Was he really crazy? Or did he just remove the filter that rest of us see the world through? You decide. Anyways, pure greatness.

Billy Crudup as Doc Manhatten. He's blue, he teleports, he builds a weird, new-wave glass condo on Mars, it's all there. I think the part was played pretty well. My only problem is his voice. I don't know what I was expecting, but somehow, that wasn't quite it. I think it's that, for someone with so much power, well, his voice doesn't convey that. Maybe it's just me. Regardless, that "just me" comment is just a nitpick. Also, beware of a multitude of glowing blue penises in this film. They pop up quite often (no pun intended).

Patrick Wilson as Nite Owl. What to say. I loved it. To me, Nite Owl was the sensible one. He's the Batman of the Watchmen universe, relying on his gadgets and intelligence to get shit done. He's also human. He was once a superhero and now he's an out-of-work superhero who put on a few pounds around the midsection. He missess the old job. It was his livelihood. So much his livelihood that he has problems getting it up. Yeah. If that doesn't make you feel something for his character...for shame! Really though, Wilson gave Nite Owl a believability that I can't quite put my finger on. He was the sense of reason. He was your voice in the movie. I found myself relating to him the most (sans the lack of a healthy blood flow, if you catch my drift--that was remedied later in the movie, BTW).

The Comedian. First "hero" seen in the book, first one seen in the film. Played by Jeffery Dean Morgan who has really been popping up on my radar in the "kick's ass" category, which is hard for me to admit. Why? Because the only things I've seen him in are TV's Grey's Anatomy and P.S. I Love You. That's right, entertainment primarily for the female audience. Tara watches 'em, I watch them with her. It happens. Still, every time I've seen JDM, his characters are just extremely likeable guys. Ironic, since the Comedian is the most despicable character in Watchmen. Still, there were those moments when, despite the baaaaad shit you've seen him do, you enjoyed seeing the Comedian. THAT is what JDM brought to the character.

Finally, Ozymandias, played by Matthew Goode. Can't say the guy has ever blipped on the radar. Period. I don't know if this movie will change that. Don't get me wrong, he did alright here, but only alright. There were some nuances he brought--like giving Ozzy a slight touch of a German accent while among friends while keeping a strictly American accent while in the public eye--to the character, but nothing he did is going to make me jump out of my seat in excitement the next time I see the trailer for a Matthew Goode film. Passable.

Now, the story. Like I mentioned, things are missing. The biggest thing: the squid. If you don't know what I'm talking about, no worries. I may actually say that this was...a...good...change. Maybe...? Let's face it, a giant squid is hard to fathom. The change they made just works better for a mega motion picture like this. Maybe it's blasphemy, maybe not. Either way, I said it. In some ways, I think it helps make things more cohesive.

I could go on about other small things I noticed were missing, but I'm not going to. For one, this is a 12 issues comic series condensed, like I said, into 2 hours and 45 minutes. Yet that's not the full film. There is also a 3+ hour version with additional scenes, and a 3 hour and 20 minute ultimate version with the animated Tales of the Black Freighter to be spliced in on top of the additional scenes. The studios allow for a limited amount of time for theatrical movies. Once I see the FULL versions, then I'll go through the missing bits.

The effects were well done. There was noticeable CGI, but I've learned that sometimes you just have to roll with the punches. After all, it wasn't Sci-Fi channel original movie CGI.

The music. Well, I liked most of the songs they chose, although occasionally they felt out of place. Another reviewer, probably on Ain't It Cool, mentioned this as well. Tyler Bates' score just fit. I didn't feel like it was overly imposing. It added to scenes, but didn't overpower them.

This isn't a film for everyone. It can be pretty slow. It can be pretty dense. It, most likely, will require more than one viewing. But I do believe it to be a quality film. In all honesty, I don't think anyone could have ever done it better. Like the Lord of the Rings, if you watch the Watchmen, you'll be given the heart of the story they want you to know. Things will be changed, things will be missing, but by the time the credits role, the essence has remained, more-or-less, in tact.

Ok, so I'm starting to go cross-eyed now. 4 AM. Yay. Is this a coherent review? Probably not. I'll re-read it tomorrow and I'm sure an open-palmed slap to the forehead will follow. Alas, in my current state of mind, I can do no better. I just needed to get my thoughts written down while the film was still fresh in my mind. Bare with me.

I also want to add that tonight was only my first viewing of Watchmen. I hope to go again soon--as early as tomorrow night (Friday)--to view it in less of a "geeked-out" state of mind. So yeah, these are preliminary thoughts. I'm sure I'm missing things I wanted to comment on, I'm sure there are things badly worded, and I'm sure this is way too fucking long for most people to still be reading, but I'm still typing.

Coraline

February 8, 2009

From the director of The Nightmare Before Christmas, Henry Selick, comes Coraline, the story of a young girl who discovers an "other world" where life is always happy...or so she thinks. One part Alice in Wonderland, one part--naturally--The Nightmare Before Christmas, Coraline is a fantastic film employing the well known but seldom used stop-motion animation.

Based on the book by Neil Gaiman (Beowulf, Stardust), Coraline is about a girl, Coraline Jones (played spot-on by Dakota Fanning), who is unhappy about the way her life is playing out. Her parents, both writers, seem to have no time for her, and thus Coraline is left to her own devices in her new home. Stalked by a creepy Quasimodo type named Wybie and his mangy, feral cat, Coraline spends her time exploring her new place of residence. It is here that she finds a small doorway that leads to an "other world". Just like her own universe, the other world has dopplegangers of those she knows. Everything seems wonderful there, as long as you can look past (no pun intended) the whole having buttons for eyes thing. Coraline soon realizes everything isn't quite so happy on the other side of the doorway, and it's up to her to set things right and save herself and those around her.

This is a film based on a children's book, but I was surprised at some of imagery included. Things do seem very magical, but at the same time, I was always dealing with this very strong sense of being disturbed. Everything was too perfect. Inanimate objects come to life and are at first playful, but soon become obstructions in Coraline's path to freedom. Her "other mother" is loving in the beginning, but it soon becomes clear that she is something more wicked. A wolf--or maybe spider--in sheep's clothing, the "other mother" wants to fit Coraline with a brand new set of shiny black button-eyes and keep her there--forever. I have to say, this film may require another viewing in theaters. Not only is it a spectacle that I fully endorse for theatrical viewing, but it was almost a movie that instigated sensory overload. I just got out of it and yet there was so much to look at that I may have missed something. I KNOW what I saw and I know the things I saw gave me a strong sense of unease, but I can't describe it here. Suffice it to say, you must go see this film.

Don't get me wrong, you're probably not going to have nightmares (although some of the younguns might), but like I said, it just evokes this FEELING; something you can't quite put your finger on. Seeing the "other mother" in her true form, seeing ghosts of the children that came before Coraline, seeing people who are so normal become button-eyed zombies, the imagery is like a nightmare come to life. Nothing quite so strong as to make you wake up screaming, but the kind of "what the fuck" dream that will make you snap awake and question your sanity.

Also, for a PG movie, wow was there some seeming inappropriate imagery when it came to women in the film. One of the characters, the first time I saw her, I was nearly dumbstruck at the size of her rack. It's freakin' clay for cryin' out loud! In a kids movie! No, seriously, we're talking FFF size here. BEACHBALLS. And then they show her later, on a stage, in an opera, wearing nothing from the waist up but PASTIES! And yes, there was even physics applied to 'em; she walks, they bounce. Just seemed to me to be a bit much for a PG movie made for children.

Still, this 22 year old thinks this may be in his top 10 films of all-time. Granted, I'm coming down from that first-time high that comes from experiencing something that astounded, but that's why I said "may be". I wanna watch it again before I give a solid vote of "yay" or "nay".

Regardless, this film cannot be overlooked. It is, technically, a feat of wonders. The animation is incredible. And I have to give it to Dakota, she really holds up her end of the film. Actually, the acting all around was top notch. A little over-the-top at times, but it was what was called for. The 3D, although I didn't see it in a theater capable of such, was NOT over-the-top. It wasn't a barrage of things flying of the screen. Instead, the 3D was used to make the world come to life, to really give it a sense of DEPTH.

I know, I know! I'm ranting and raving and rambling on (as usual). Cut me a little slack though, it's nearly midnight and I just wanted to hammer this thing out. I'm sure it's convoluted but I'm gonna give you readers out there the benefit of the doubt; you'll be able to sift through the muck and find the review--a shining one--I have planted within.

To summarize, I highly, HIGHLY recommend this movie. I know Rapids didn't get it, but Bemidji did and, for that, I'm thankful. This is a film I'm so so glad to have experienced in the theaters, on the big screen. I may be praising this thing to high heaven, and that might get some of your hopes high--too high. So think of it this way: if you like the imagery of films like The Nightmare Before Christmas or James and the Giant Peach (not to mention that weird creepiness), and if you're a fan of fantasy along the lines of Alice in Wonderland, I'd bet dollars to donuts (no idea what that actually means) that you'd find enjoyment here.

And yes, this will be added to my collection upon it's release. On Blu-Ray, no less.

Twilight Hype

November 21, 2008

Alright, I need to get some work done so I'm going to keep this short. I bought the Stephanie Meyer books--starting with Twilight--for Tara as a birthday gift. I figured they might work as a sort of gateway drug to geekiness (yes, I'm bringing her over to the geek-side). It worked. She really got into 'em; within 3 days she'd read all 500 pages of the first one and was diving right into the second. Needless to say, she also got really excited about the Twilight movie. In fact, she was so excited that, for once, SHE was the one who wanted to hit up the midnight showing of a movie. I'm so proud.

Anyways, this is just gonna be my take on that movie. Let me start off by saying that I've never read the books. I knew going into the movie that it was vampires and romance and...yeah. I love vampires but the romance side, not so much. Regardless, I wanted to go because Tara wanted to go. And seeing as she loves the books, I went in with an open mind.

Now, I want to start off by saying outright that I didn't dislike the movie. It wasn't a BAD movie. It just wasn't my kind of movie. My hopes, going into it, were that this would be a romantic movie (playing to the female audience) and a vampire movie (playing to both the male and female audience). Instead, what I got was a romance that had not very much vampire-y stuff, or, rather, the vampire side wasn't showcased to the extent I would have liked.

I think the movie suffered from a few things, one being the pacing. The beginning is very slow, then the last half hour ratchets things up a bit. It's romance, romance, romance, slight action, romance.

If I'd have gotten what I wanted there would have been a good romance (again, for the ladies), and some bad-ass vampire action (for the men). Instead, even the vampire side was romance. The one scene that started to get me interested was the baseball scene. At this point we're really getting a chance to see the interesting side of the vampires. Sure, Edward already showed up he's fast and strong, but it was all done in a sulky, mopey "i'm not glamorous, i'm a monster" tone. The baseball scene showed them using their extraordinary power to have fun and it made me have fun too. Then the tension gets bumped up a notch when the baddies show and this brings me to my favorite scene within my favorite scene. Slight SPOILERS: when the baddies make a move to attack Bella, the entire Cullen family immediately moves in front of her, protecting her. Later, Carlyle says that Bella is part of their family now and that they take care of their family. This was the most, uh...moving?...part of the movie in my opinion. It was finally stepping beyond the self-importance of the main characters (Edward and Bella), who, yes, were interested in each other, but that still carried an idea of selfishness. Instead, this was a family of vampires who could have just done nothing but decided that if this girl was important enough to their son, she was a part of the family, vampire or no.

Then there's the final showdown. I'm just gonna sum it up in one [hyphenated] word: anit-climactic.

Beyond that, the dialog was pretty corny at some points. Also, it felt as if the filmmakers didn't think the audience would be able to put stuff together on their own so they blatantly told us things.

Still, for all my gripes, I can see how a lot of people will like this movie. Let me stress again, it just wasn't MY TYPE of movie. If you like vampires and really want a romantic movie, check it out. If you're hoping for Blade, 30 Days of Night, The Lost Boys, or even Interview with the Vampire, well, watch one of those.


Again, I kind of hammered this thing out so I'm sure there's a bunch of grammar problems and I know I could have re-worded things into a more succinct fashion. Sorry, you're just going to have to sort it out on your own. ;) Maybe I'll touch it up another time.

Bloody Disgusting presents Dead Pixels

Spreading the joy of podcasts. I work from home on my computer so there's lot's o' podcast listenin' goin' on.

October 23, 2008

So Dead Space was recently released and I, being the horror guru that I am, have already spent close to ten hours playing it. Prior to that release, the Dead Pixels podcast had a contest where listeners could write in and explain why they were excited about Dead Space. Just for shits and giggles, I submitted an entry; to my amazement, I won. It was announced--along with a reading of my submission--on the newest episode (posted today). For said victory, I'll be receiving a nifty little bundle of treasures.

I'm sure most of you could care less, but I figured I'd post it anyways. Somehow, I've been getting lucky with these contest submissions; first I won 2 tickets to a pre-screening of Hellboy 2 in Chicago, and now this. Crazy, huh? Anyways, until next time--

Oh, yeah. One more thing. Check out Bloody Disgusting for info on everything Horror. The Bloody Disgusting podcasts (Bloody-Disgusting.com, Dead Pixels, and Double Murder) can be downloaded through iTunes (C'mon, they're sending me free swag; the least I can do is a little shameless promotion).

Movies + Alcohol = FUN!!!

Found these on the intraweb. Can't remember where. Either way, I do not claim credit for these. Someone else's invention, but I enjoy them so I share.

October 12, 2008

Zombie Movies
Take a drink every time...

...a human gets bitten by a zombie
...a key character becomes a zombie
...someone kills a key character zombie
...someone explains how to kill a zombie
...fire is used to frighten a zombie
...fire is used to kill a zombie
...someone shoots a zombie in the head
...someone uses an unorthodox weapon on a zombie (take two drinks if it works)
...zombies eat human flesh
...a victim is dismembered

Horror Movies
Take a drink every time...

...someone dies (take two drinks if it's an authority figure)
...there's a sex scene
...there's onscreen nudity
...you can see the killer but the characters can't/don't
...the killer is wounded
...a girl screams (take two drinks if it's a guy)
...there's a false scare
...the power goes out
...a car won't start (take two drinks if it's at a crucial moment)
...a gun runs out of bullets at a crucial moment
...a character trips or falls while being chased
...the "dead" killer gets up for one final scare

Podcast, anyone?

Alrighty, here's the deal. If anyone is looking for a new podcast to listen to, I recommend Geekson. To quote the website: "Geekson is a weekly show created by geeks, for geeks, covering topics that geeks like to talk about. Movies, Sci-fi, Video Games, Comics, TV, Internet, Board Games, RPGs.... it's all here at Geekson.com."

The website has an archive of all past episodes (or you can download 'em via iTunes). The foursome (Aaron, Matt, Don & Peter) cover everything from the newest movies; the greatest television shows; comics; novels; board, role-playing, and video games. There's a geek-oriented news segment as well as coverage of major geek events (E3 and Comicon). There's even a number of guests that drop in from time to time.

A plus: you don't have to be a geek to listen. The discussions--borderline bickering--created by the Geekson crew are interesting and quite often hilarious.

There really is something for everyone. So, if you're sitting at your computer and have an hour or two to burn, give Geekson a try. You may not find everything discussed agreeable, but chances are you'll be entertained a [vast] majority of the time.

Geekson

My Two Cents: [REC]

I wrote this in January of 2008. Yeah, it's that old. Also, when I write, I just hammer my thoughts out. Sometimes they read better than others. I try to do a little editing but I just don't have the time to revise a post to perfection. If you actually read enough of these, you'll probably start to get a feel for my style. It's not great writing, and I definitely tend to ramble, but it's mine and, for better or worse, I'm proud of it. Enjoy.

Let me start of by saying that it is 6:14 in the morning on New Years Day of 2008 and I am (obviously) sitting at my computer, thinking about the film I just finished watching. Yes, this is in fact my 2 cents on a film. A horror film, no less. You see what I did there? With the title? Clever, I know. Anywho, for those of you who aren't interested in horror movies or just don't care what I have to say, go ahead and skip class this morning. No offense taken. For everyone else...

Alright, the topic of discussion is the Spanish horror film [REC]. I came across this film on upcominghorrormovies.com and was immediately interested. So, I did a bit MORE research, tapping my favorite resource, IMDb.com. My interest grew. I had to see it. Sadly, foreign films are hard to come by, especially if they've only just been released in their country of origin. But, after much searching and dedication, I found it. The rub? It was in Spanish with nary a subtitle in sight. What did this mean for me? Duh, it meant I was going to be watching a film without understanding a word of what was being said. Yes, I did watch this foreign film with out a translation. No, I have no real idea what all was said. Interestingly enough, this had no negative impact on the viewing.

[REC], as I said, is a horror film from Spain, that can be best described as a cross between the Blair Witch Project and Danny Boyle's excellent film 28 Days Later... In other words: first person camera perspective + "zombies" = joygasm! This is about a TV reporter who, with the help of her cameraman (us), is covering the night shift at the fire department. In the middle of the night the men get a call and soon enough we are on our way to an apartment building to offer assistance and film the events that transpire. Once there, we see that something is amiss. It appears an old lady upstairs is off her rocker. Let me rephrase: she's fuckin' psycho! Covered in blood and, for all intents and purposes, rabid, she attacks. Things get... a bit hectic, the movie slows back down, then things get good. I have to say, watching this film at 4 in the morning in a dark house was great. Honestly, the last 15 minutes of this movie had me riveted. I finally know what "edge of your seat" means. Blinking is not an option here, people.

Because this is shot in the same style as the Blair Witch, there is a lot of shaking. There is a lot of blurriness. There is a LOT of chaos. While some will probably find it annoying, it adds so much to the tension. This isn't a film set with directors and steady-cams and make-up artists. This movie is on the move, the camera is in a man's hands, running up and down stairs, wrestling with the infected, fighting for survival. You feel as if you are actually there, holding the camera, and that makes everything that much more visceral.

I can't say it enough: I absolutely loved this flick. Sadly, it's over much too soon with a little over a 70 minute run time. On the plus side, those 70 minutes are very well spent. If this sounds like something you'd be interested in (if you're a horror buff like me), I'm sad to say you're most likely going to have to wait a couple of months for a DVD release here in the States (with subtitles though!). I, myself, am working on getting some subs and I'm sure once I do the film will be that much better. Again, a must-see for horror movie fanatics.

Trailer can be seen here: http://www.3l-filmverleih.de/rec/rec_1.html

I'm Back!

Ok, so being back doesn't really say much if I was never truly here to begin with. Still, you get my meaning. Even though they weren't posted on here, I have written a few random ramblings in other places (i.e. Facebook). I'm going to transfer the bulk of what I've written there over to here.

Disclaimer: this blog isn't going to be about any one thing. I'm a fairly random guy so expect a fairly random blog. It will center around reviews of movies I've seen (though not EVERY movie I've seen), but there will also be my thoughts on games and book and anything else I feel worthy of the time it takes me to post something. Quite often, I just like to vent; you'll probably be seeing that now and again.